I <3

Is it possible that Benton James will be three months old on Saturday? I have no words.

❤

The Walk

I. Love. Crunchy. Leaves.

LOVE.

If you are a pile of crunchy leaves, prepare to meet my stompy foot. I can’t help it. You’re asking for it, just sitting there being all colorful and crunchable. I’m looking forward to teaching Benton about this. Hoping he uses two stompy feet and jumps on them repeatedly. Because that would make his mama proud.

For now, I was the active member of our early fall walk yesterday. B slept like a good baby, and I took photos. 900mb of photos in just an hour.

SO. Let’s just say I had a good time. Clearly.

It was one of those things I did just for me. Which is so so so important.

More here. Are you on Flickr? Let’s be friends.

Goats

Before we had a baby, Justin and I would go on dates to children’s movies and petting zoos. So now that we actually have a kid, we are pleased to appear slightly less creepy during these excursions.

One of my favorite things about being a parent so far, is that I get to witness a little person seeing the world for the first time. I love knowing that he has never seen a fish,  park, or a cat on a bus before, and I was there to witness the first observance.

Justin shares this excitement for the “new,” so we decided to take him to the zoo. This is more for our entertainment than his, but it kept him interested for a few hours and he didn’t make a fuss. If you judge from the pictures alone, it would appear that he hated it, but I assure you we were not torturing the baby. He loves adventures.

Which brings me to the goats. There are few animals that more ridiculous. And the fact that the eat everything makes me wonder why they are often chosen as ideal petting zoo candidates.

As we approached the corral, I was giddy with excitement and Justin held Benton with cautious optimism. He assured the petting zoo overlord that we were not going to let him touch the goats, we just wanted pictures. They were weary. I assume they thought the goats would easily ingest the baby, and they didn’t want a lawsuit. Or a goat that had eaten a baby.

Surveying the scene from behind the fence.

The scene inside the fence.

We're in! Notice the tenseness of Justin's stance. This is as close as he would get him. Meanwhile I am yelling "Put his foot by it!! Closer!"

B, what do you think of this? No gang signs with the hands, please. I bet if you lean back just a bit, you would get a little mohawk hair trim.

Aren't you a fine goat specimen? "Put the baby by it!"

GAH! He really tried to eat Justin's elbow. Which can only lead to baby foot nomming. So we left. But give us a year or so and we will be back. Many times. P.S. What is with goat pupils? Scary.

bye bye

The Furrowed Brow

I confess that may be misrepresenting the baby at this point. I would say he has gone from 100% furrowed all the time, down to only 50%. It’s pretty easy to get a smile out of him these days. He thought folding the laundry was a riot today. His fussy hour is even less fussy if he has the right amount of entertainment or socializing. But I couldn’t resist posting these preciously serious furrowed brow shots.

Because what if the tiny furrow disappears all together? He changes so fast. I will surely miss the concerned looks if he grows out of it. I guess I will just have to have another baby then. 🙂

Speaking of which, if you are a parent of more than one kid, how far did you space them out? Did you have a plan? Lack of any plan? How many years in between children worked best for your family? Should I be concerned about lack of bedrooms or just make it work? If you don’t have more than one, but plan to, what factors are you waiting on before trying to get pregnant again or adopting a second baby?

Don’t get all excited/worried about me just yet. I have some one-on-one time I want to spend with the sweet baby I have napping on my lap. I’m just curious about what makes people take that big step into having more than one kid. Do tell.

The Overshare Eight

I was tagged by The Little Big. I don’t usually do stuff like this. Not because I feel I am above it, but when I sit down to write, I generally do it stream of consciousness style. But we are in a semi-serious internet relationship. So honor your Significant Internet Others and do as they ask. OK? K.

If you could have any superpower, what would you have? Why?
A “save game” function would be splendid. I could pause my life and then continue on. It would allow me to return to that safe point if something went wrong and then I could try a different route. Risk taking would be way less…risky. If I could not be granted this superpower, my second choice would be that I could command all pants fit me all the time. EVERY PANT. ALWAYS. That would be truly special.

Who is your style icon? I don’t have a style icon because I am really bad at keeping up with anything celebrity related. There have definitely been people who I admire in my personal life when it comes to style. But I doubt you know these people, so it is useless to mention them here. When I went to Italy this one time, I loved how everyone seemed fashionable. Especially the older generations. They don’t just give up after a certain age. I think that is something to strive for.

What is your favorite quote? “Here’s your one chance Fancy, don’t let me down.”

What is the best compliment you’ve ever received? I grew up being told I was smart. But never pretty. My mom was especially careful not to call me pretty. I was told I was creative or talented. These are wonderful things to be told and I have a good self-esteem because of it. Thanks, Mom. BUT I never thought of myself as pretty. One time I overheard my uncle’s boyfriend tell my mom that I was gorgeous during a family gathering. She shushed him in the other room. Told him not to let me know. MOM?!?! Geez. So hopefully if I have a daughter someday, I can try to balance the smart and pretty compliments for her. Because now when people tell me I am pretty, I think it is a HUGE compliment and get kind of embarrassed. But I only half believe them and feel super awkward. Issues.

What playlist/cd is in your CD player/iPod right now? I am music impaired. I don’t ever know what is going on or what is new. I rely on my friends Amber and Dan to tell me what to get. I spent a whole lot of time putting together a birth mix for Benton’s labor and delivery. I barely used it. But the Baraka soundtrack was on there. High five the two of you who have any idea what I am talking about. Also, Ray Charles makes it onto about every mix that I put together. And Johnny Cash. Please send me current music suggestions. PLEASE.

Are you a night owl or a morning person? I do way better in the mornings. And these days I don’t stay up much passed 9:30 p.m. I feel like everything is possible in the morning and tend to feel kind of sad at night. I also like the dewy sparkles if I am ever outside really early. When I used to run when the sun was coming up, I swear my heart would nearly explode from freshy fresh sparkly happiness. Then my knees totally fell apart and I gained a million pounds and had a baby. Someday I would like to do the morning exercise thing again. It was really good for my soul.

Do you prefer dogs or cats? Duh.

What is the meaning behind your blog name? When I started this thing, I liked to upload a daily picture of happiness and write about it. So the blog was chock full of good things. And my name is Megan. So Megagood was created. That is that.

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I am not going to tag anyone, but if you do the Overshare Eight, I would love to read it. Link me to it!

The Guilt of Happy

I have been thinking about writing this post for some time. But I am always afraid to hit publish. But after reading my friend Erin’s recent post, I am following her lead. I had a half-glass of wine (I’m a SUPER lightweight these days) and decided to write.

So here we go: Internet, I am happy. AND this motherhood thing is coming naturally to me.

There. I said it. *runs to hide*

So why do I feel so guilty about it? There are a lot of times during the day that I censor my updates because they are way too Pollyanna and syrupy. I feel bad for feeling good. I don’t want people who are having a hard time to become irritated with me or think there is something wrong with them if they are not on cloud nine. I don’t want to be kicked out of the new mommy club.

I fully expected the early days with my baby to be much more difficult than they are turning out to be. Everything isn’t easy, but it certainly isn’t a rough time around here.

Since I can remember, I have never been very good at knowing what to say when someone is having a hard time, suffered a loss, or experienced tragedy. It isn’t that I am insensitive, I just always feel at a loss for words. I don’t want to come across sounding fake, but sometimes the stuff I come up with to comfort someone just sounds lame. I envy those people who always know what to say. How do you learn such a thing? Can you learn such a thing?

I feel like I would be a better friend if I figured out how to articulate my empathy. I need to learn how to give better hugs, to be more of a feeler and less of a thinker, and to tell people how I feel about them. Especially the ones I love. I can write about these things just fine, but if you met me in person, it might be tough to know what exactly was going on. I don’t communicate my emotions very well in real life. This has to change.

So if we do meet, go in for a hug, because I need practice. And if you are having a bad day and I am having a good one, it doesn’t mean we can’t get along, right? I want to tell you that I am having a fabulous time, but I hate to sound like I ‘m bragging, so I might not say anything.

I am sure that there will be times when I am feeling like total crap, and need some love when you are feeling good. I promise not to hate your for being happy.

Please don’t hate me.

Smile guilt

The Cure to Fussy Hour

Play group in the park.

Benton loves people. LOVES. He is happiest when being held and chatted up by a larger human. He doesn’t care if it’s a stranger. In fact, he seems to be at his best when meeting new people.

I am beginning to think that his nightly fussy hour is due to being bored with his parents. We had a party this weekend during the fussy hour, and he was totally into it. I think he wishes we lived with a dozen other roommates so he wouldn’t get sick of the same of mom and dad faces. Rude.

Last week, we went on an adventure every day. Trains, buses, and cars. Uptown, downtown, and in between. He was into it. These adventures were more for my sake, but any place that involved people was good in his book.

Do babies with very social tendencies grow into kids that are social as well? How much can I really tell about his personality from what he likes at 10 weeks? Let me know what your experience is with this.

Mommy Goggles

I’m so thankful that I didn’t suffer any blues or PPD as some moms do. The only blues I am dealing with are these.

I am about 95% sure they will start turning brown in a bit, so I have to get some staring time in while they are still here. Not that I won’t love the brown eyes. Brown eyes are clearly awesome.

I want to dive into them. We spent awhile memorizing each others’ faces this afternoon. I realized that I have been taking too many crappy cell phone pictures because that is easier. So I got the real camera out and got in close. Because he changes SO FAST.

I always figured that I would think my baby was cute (as any mom does), but everyday I am astounded by how many hours I can spend staring at him in awe. How did he possibly come from me? Is he really here? Was he really NOT here at some point? Whose lips are those? Will they smile at me if I act like a fool for him? These are the burning questions of a new adoring mama.

Mirror Game

I just hit send on my formal letter of resignation to my agency life.

And then I sat on the floor with my baby and a mirror and we played. We are working hard on turning the furrow into smiles.

Then I realized how gorgeous Chicago is today, so now we are going to take the train downtown to eat gelato in the park and introduce Benton to the Bean.

Here is the last time they were together. 76 days ago. Um...WOW.

There are a lot of people in cubes who would be pissed off if I wasn’t taking full advantage to being free of said cube. So in the name of not taking things for granted, I am off.

Just Did It

I felt so good today. I didn’t have any of those nervous new mom moments with the little man. Things just came naturally to me, and we moved through the day with ease.

I didn’t have to think about how to get him into the ring sling. It didn’t take more than a couple of seconds, and I didn’t use a mirror. My body and mind had memorized the process. And I just did it.

I didn’t need to carefully orchestrate the order I needed to do things to get him in and out of the car. I just did it.

There were no worries about getting him ready quickly before we left the house. I just did it.

I wasn’t nervous about feeding him around other people. WE just did it.

When he needs something, I have it.

When he sees my face, he knows who I am and responds with a grin if I am lucky.

Since I finally felt like I knew what I was doing all day, I’m starting to feel like a good mom. Whatever that means. I want to try some new things with him this week that push beyond the boundaries of my comfort zone. Because I should take advantage of this confidence, before he kicks my butt with some new stage I haven’t figured out yet.

What should we do?

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I am posting the following pictures that my mother-in-law took during their visit last weekend because I owe Justin some blog love and JUST LOOK AT THE CUTE>